Fresher Than A Muhfucka (FTAMF)

Rihanna

“You good” I asked as I walked into Chris’ room.

“Yeah” he said blandly as he watched some PBS show.

“Quit lying nigga. I know you better than I know myself.” I found a seat on the chaise lounge across from the bed.

“This is some bullshit man!” He threw the remote down. “Why these niggas always messing with me! Ion do shit, ion fuck with nobody! I do what the fuck I’m supposed to do, yet I STILL get backlashes… Fuck this shit.” Chris paced the room.

“Chris. You gotta chill. Roll an L and throw your middle fingers up at them hating ass bitches” I grabbed his shoulders to stop him from pacing. “Look at me! Chill Christopher. Forreal! You can’t show them you mad! You can show them that you’re hurting in any type of way. Fuck it”

Chris stopped and stared at me for a moment… Clenching his jaw.

“I only want what’s best for you” I continued. ” I only want what’s best for you… What’s best” I scanned his face.

“Get out Rih” he mumbled.

“What?” I asked.

“Get out. I’m not dumb. I’m not stupid. Quit tryna push up on me. I get that you’re tryna support a nigga, but don’t fuck my relationship with my girls up, in her house, where she’s allowing you to live. She don’t trust you, she got reasons not to.”

“Alright Chris” I chuckled on the low. He could ALWAYS smell my bullshit.
“I got you. Just don’t retaliate” I walked out.

Liliana

“Oh HELL NO!” I yelled as soon as I’d got tho the basement to begin working again.

Rihanna thought it was CUTE to erase my whole song and leave a letter saying …

“Never Help The Enemy”

“Lord” I folded my head in my hands “I am trying SO hard to forgive my enemies… But THIS bit-girl, is going to receive thy fists. Please deliver me from evil and temptation. Cause it’s ABOUT TO GO DOWN…”

“RIHANNA!” I called as I stormed upstairs.

“You bellowed Madame” Rihanna laid comfortably on my couch.

I laughed slightly, trying to calm myself and lower my voice before I ruin Chris’ day further.

“Why are you such a hatin ass bitch” I laid back on the wall across from the couch where Rihanna lie.

“Excuse me” she muted the TV.

“You heard me bitch” I spat in a whisper. “Why.Are.You.Such.A.HATING.ASS.BITCH”

“Please bitch .. What is there to hate off of” Rihanna rose on the couch.

“Is we mad? I hope not” I giggled as I walked to the bedroom.

“This ain’t over! You lucky Chris ain’t feeling good. Otherwise I’d fuck yo ass up” she whispered to my back.

“Forreal bitch? I’ll be waiting”

***

“What can I do to help you babe” I asked Chris as I messaged his back.

“Just continue to be here for me” he stared angrily at CNN.

“Don’t watch that shit…” I changed the channel to VH1 Soul and Yo began to fill the surround sound speakers.

I looked to Chris, not knowing if I should change the channel, but his glare confused me. He wasn’t just staring at the tv. There was a lot of emotion in his eyes but his complete facial expression lie lifeless.

I remained quiet for the whole entire video. The video was one of the many in the ‘Chris Brown Playlist’ they had playing for the day. I reached for the remote but Chris pressed my hand.

I looked to him and he stared at me with something I’d never witnessed before. My arm whimpered but Chris invited me to sit next to him on the bed.

We sat there for the whole hour, just watching videos of him. He laid his head in my lap and a stream of tears soaked through my leggings.

I’d never seen a man cry. In real life, no. I didn’t know what to do. I rubbed his back and allowed him to feel comfortable to let it out.

***

Nothing has been said and a move had not been made. Chris was still in my lap. I really think he was sleeping. His phone went off, my phone went off. The room was dark as shit. I was hungry and had to pee.

I tried to slide Chris’ head off my lap, but he woke in an instant.

“Where you going?” His face swollen and his eyes bloodshot.

“To the bathroom” I looked back at him as he contemplated something.

“Come back” he said as he lay his head back.

“Okay” I furrowed my eyebrows. A sista handled her business and brought some food back for Chris and I, but when I came to the room, this nigga was not in here.

“Chris?” I asked as I heard shuffling in my closet.

Now I know what you thinking … Why the hell am I walking towards the noise and asking who it is … But bare with me

I walk in the closet and Chris changed into a hoodie and some running shoes.

“Let’s go jogging” he told me as he laced up his shoes.

“Um okay … But can we eat first.”

“Yeah ion care” he continued to dress himself.

I walked back into the room to eat my sandwich when Chris came into the room.

“You down for me right?” Chris asked.

“Uh yeah Chris. Why wouldn’t I be?” I asked with a mouth full of sammich.

“Coo” he walked out of the room. “Check your phone too”

I checked my texts:

Alex: We have unfinished business. Answer the damn phone when I call .

D’marcus: Just know I’m watching you. Nice voicemail tho. ‘Newest member to CBE’ how cute!

WHHHY ! Why do I have to go for crazy niggas ? Can’t they just chill.

The sound of shattering glass in the front of the house filled my bedroom.

I got up quick and put on shoes, but the sound of gunshots stopped me in my tracks.

What’s going on?

*1 Month Later*

Chris:

A lot of shit has gone DOWN in these last 4 weeks. I mean HEEEEEELLA shit yo.

Last week Mijo got booked for some shit I have yet to discover

Ty and Honey have decided to become porn directors… Don’t even get me started on that shit.

Ty’s lil sister Savonna got sent off to an all girl school in North Korea.

Karrueche has made it her ULTIMATE goal to fuck shit up between Liliana and I.

Alex ass almost caught a clip from Mijo’s older brother D’marcus. Now D’marcus is in jail too.

Kamary got back with Kae’s Pops. Why I know this? Cause Karrueche slow ass think I really care bout her life.

And finally, the whole shebang bang of this whole fucked up month… Rih turned herself into a rehab centre and put my name on all the guardian papers. MEANING, I am in charge of her care and she must live with me. I live with Liliana … You KNOW I’ve had the fattest headache with these useless ass arguments and fighting.

Ion got time for this bullshit… Especially while Lili and I are planning to go on tour together.

“Did y’all have fun last night?” I heard Rih as I dug in the fridge for a Capri Sun.

“What do you mean Robyn” I sighed as I slammed the door shut. I knew exactly what she was talking about, but if I started some shit right now my sleeping princess would wake up and beat me and Robyn both the fuck up.

“You know what I’m talking about ya pussy smelling ass nigga… I heard y’all banging from upstairs Christopher! I ain’t deaf. Sound like you was strangling the bitch” Rihanna chuckled as I screwed my face towards her.

“That’s cause I did… I kilt that punani Cuh” I said licking my fingers obnoxiously.

“Ew you nasty ass”

“Shut the fuck up cause you worse than I am” I yelled.

“Well you know me!” She blushed.

I heard the bedroom door slam and quick steps coming towards the kitchen.

“There she go” Rihanna whispered and walked back into the living room.

“Christopher can I talk to you?” Liliana peered around the corner in her silk robe.

“Yeah babe” I trailed behind her all the way to the room expecting her to be hot as hell. “Look I didn’t mean-“

“No I’m not mad bout y’all being loud… That don’t matter to me… Do you see this shit? Look what ya ex ex bitch is saying about me again on twitter!”

“@karrueche: I’ll never steal nobodies man bitch @_LilianaJ”

“@karrueche: Yeah I @’Ed you … Run the issue bitch”

“Chris…” Liliana looked back up at me with furrowed eyebrows “… Get this bitch before I snap her fucking neck and be on CNN the same fucking night for kicking the bitches head down Rodeo Drive. Keep playing with me.”

I couldn’t help but laugh. Her temper was too fucking cold. We bad in that aspect. Cause we both hotheaded and that’s not good.

“I got her. Haha. Don’t worry babe”

“Oh I’m not worried… She needa be worried” Liliana turned around and submerged herself into the computer.

“Yo I’m bouta go grab breakfast you want anything?” I grabbed Liliana’s keys from the tv stand.

“From where?” She turned around to face me.

“McDonalds nigga”

“They been stopped selling breakfast nigga it’s 12!” Liliana slapped her thigh.

“My bad my bad” I checked the time on my phone.

“Go to Jack N Da Crack and get me some chicken strips, strawberry milkshake, and a medium fry” Liliana rolled back over and focused back on the computer.

“Gotchu ma” I smacked her ass before I ran out the room.

“Fuck you Chris!” She yelled.

“Love you too” I yelled back. “Robs … I’m going to Jack N Da Box you want something?”

“Lemme get uuuh … 2 breakfast jacks a medium fry and a medium sprite” Rihanna stared at her phone screen.

“Coo. Don’t kill my baby” I warned her.

“You got a kid” Robyn sassed.

“Just keep the house in tact” I responded.

“BYE nigga dis ain’t yo house” Robyn shoved me through the door.

Liliana

*30 minutes later*

Chris ass still ain’t here and I needed to get some work done. PLUS I’m hungrier than a fat bitch.

“Aye” I called to Rihanna down the hallway.

“You talking to me?” She responded.

I scoffed lowly at her dumb ass attitude.

“Aye come to the studio with me” I set aside my attitude. “I need someone to feature on this track”

“You want ME on there? Little ole me?” Rihanna poked.

“Bitch bring ya ass” I yelled as I opened the door to the studio.

“That’s more like it!” I heard her feet steps behind me.

***

“And it if its me, best believe em he gone beat it like he pose to. Come right over her, hit like mama showed you.” I rapped my part of the bridge to Rih.

“You really want me to rap?” She looked at me crazy.

“Basically yeah” I returned.

“Whatever whatever” Rih went back into her pen and pad. I was bouta go upstairs and try to find something to eat since Chris ass decided to make 17 hundred detours, but I remembered I ain’t trust this bitch alone by herself in my house. But the slam of my front door let me know that Chris was home and wasn’t too damn happy either. I raced up the stairs riiiight as this nigga punched a hole in my wall.

“WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING !” I ran up to his ass, damn near bouta punch the shit outta him.

“I HATE THE FUCKING POLICE NIGGA! ALWAYS PROFILING A NIGGA FOR NO DAMN REASON. BITCH ASS MUHFUCKAS” Chris yelled randomly.

“What are you talking about Chris” I lowered my tone because yelling at him wasn’t gone make the situation better. Chris paced across the kitchen a few times before he plopped on the couch in serious thought.

“So I found out what Mijo went to jail for” Chris began. “I was at the place, just got the food, as I’m tryna come out the drive through, 5, FIVE MY NIGGA, police cars were blocking my exit. I look closer, ALL them niggas got they guns pointed at me yelling ‘GET OUT THE CAR’. I ain’t have shit to hide, so a nigga turned the car off, got out, they make me lay on the ground to cuff me, read me my Miranda Rights, and throw me in the back of the car. Didn’t tell me why. Them niggas had a Tow truck ready to take the car and took my ass to the police station and tried to say I was an accomplice in the killing of Kae’s mom…”

“Wait… Mijo killed Kae’s mom?” Rihanna asked. I turned around to see she had made her way to the kitchen.

“Yeah basically” he huffed.

“Damn, that’s heavy” I sat down on the couch next to him.

“I don’t wanna turn on the news, go out in pubic, nor do I wanna go on the fucking Internet cause I know EVERYBODY and they mama gone try to rag on my ass” Chris stared off into the distance.

“Chris I-” the sound of Chris’ phone ringing cut me off. He took the phone out his pocket and threw it on the coffee table.

“Who the fuck is it?” He asked lowly.

I leaned over to the table “blocked”.

“Answer it” Chris got up from the couch as I said hello.

“Yeah, hello, is this Chris?” The female asked.

“No, um, this is his management speaking, may I ask who’s calling?”

“Damn they took babes phone line away too? Psh, iight. Well, tell him this is Kendreya and uh Chris needa call me back” ‘Kendreya’ smacked her lips.

“Yes ma’am, I’ll tell Chris right away” I said as cheerful as I could possibly.

“Yeah bitch” she hung up right in my face.

I sat on the couch, contemplating 2 things.

ONE, should I get up FUMING like I am right now. Cuss Chris ALL types of out in disregards to how he’s feeling right now. Should I be selfish.

TWO, should I just put my difference aside and support Chris then cuss his ass out when he’s feeling better. Damn I sound like a bitch .

“UGH” I stormed from the living room back to the studio. I gotta be a good girlfriend. I gotta be there for him. I can’t trip. Atleast not right now.

Liliana

5:45am 

“Liliana” Alex called behind me. “Man” he smacked his lips. “Liliana! Listen” Alex snatched my arm up. 

“Get the fuck off of me” I broke free of his arm. “What do you want?”

“Let me talk to you.” He begged. 

“What the fuck you want nigga? Make this shit quick.”

“Who the fuck you talking to?” Alex’s voice was filled with too much testosterone for someone who knew what I’m like when I don’t feel like being bothered. 

“Lemme rephrase this for your ole slow ass. What, THE FUCK, do you want?” I bucked up to him. He opened up my room door, pushing me inside the room, and locked the door back behind him. 

“Sit down” He demanded. I flashed him the stankest ass look ever in his life. Who the fuck is this nigga really talking to?

“Man, SIT THE FUCK DOWN AND STOP MAKING THIS SHIT COMPLICATED?” Alex huffed. 

“WHAT NIGGA!” I sat down reluctantly. 

“I love you” 

“Nigga get the fuck out with that fag ass shit” I arose; pushing his ass more and more towards the door. 

“Please don’t make this like Texas” He stood firmly. I was no longer able to move him towards the door.

“How dare you!” I took a step back. How this nigga gone try to tell me he love me then flip the script and tell me basically he beat me because of the way I was acting. 

“Liliana shut the fuck up! Shut up! I’m fucking tired of you not listening! Listen for one damn time in your life.” He yelled. Alex paused before he continued. “Whats going on with us? Do you want me, or do you want Chris?” 

“I don’t know” I looked away. 

“Ha” Alex chuckled. I could already tell he was genuinely pissed off. “Why do you do this type shit? Why can’t you be real with me? The only time you express your emotions is when you happy or pissed the fuck off. Why can’t you man the fuck up, quit being a damn pussy, and tell me how you feel right now.” Alex stood over me, fuming. The anger was visual in his eyes. 

“You want me to open up? forreal?” My voice was on edge. “I love two people.”

“BULLSHIT!” Alex threw his hands up. “WHY ARE YOU ALWAYS TELLING ME THIS WEAK SHIT THINKING IMMA LISTEN AND BE OKAY WITH IT?”

“Why all of a sudden I’m Lying?” 

“Why all of a sudden you ain’t been telling the truth?” He spat. I sat down on the bed, shocked. When did he get like this? Did I make him this way? 

“Okay” I sighed. “Chris and I originally started as friends. I loved his aura and humor. Just him. The first day I met him, he was tryna buy me all this shit. All these people were talking about him and I stood up for him. Like any friend would do. But playfulness turned into hitting on each other, hugs, kisses, and-” I looked down when “sex” refused to roll off my tongue. 

“Damn” Alex breathed. 

“But I quit that. A while ago.” I lied. I knew I needed to be honest, but I couldn’t be THAT honest with him right now. “When you purposed in that hospital… I knew that I had to end it. But what you did when you came back to Texas… Let me know that you had changed. I’ve been seeing that person who beat me in Texas here in Cali tonight.” 

Alex paced the room; silently absorbing everything I had just said. I didn’t have much more to say. I gave the nigga the complete overview. I hope he didn’t want the step by step. Cause everybody in this house woulda got blown the hell up.

“Okay” He stopped pacing and stared blank faced at me. 

“Okay?” I questioned. 

“I forgive you.” He said more to himself than to me. 

I said nothing. I really couldn’t believe his ass forgave me. Cause if it were me who got cheated on… as I said previously, everybody in this ouse woulda got blown the hell up.

“Yeah,” Alex glanced up at me. “I forgive you.” he headed towards the door. 

“No” A shout jumped from me. I giggled at my bi-polar ass not being able to control myself. “I want you to stay… The night.”

Chris

7:00am

“Yo,” I called out Ty and Honey. “Yo, thank you so much for doing this.” 

“Mmhm” Ty said. 

“Shut up nigga. But forreal. Thank yall.” I laughed. 

“It’s nothing little homie” Honey hugged me. 

“OH so you just huggin up on my niggas like that?” Ty shouted.

“MICHAEL IF YOU DON’T SHUT UP” Honey whispered loudly. “YOU GONE BE A RANDOM NIGGA.” Ty gasped as if he truly was offended by her saying that. 

“We out breezy” Ty smacked his lips as he passed Honey to dap me up. “Why she acting so FAAAAKE.” 

“I don’t know cuh, but if you don’t shut the hell up; its gone be real as fuck when Liliana come up in here raising hell.”

“Yeah, cause baby moms is crazy!” he laughed stupidly. 

“Yo quit calling her baby moms” I rubbed the sleep from my eyes. 

“Yo, she’s pregnant or bouta be” Ty scoffed. 

“What makes you say that?” I asked rhetorically. 

“When yall fucked, cause I KNOW y’all did… Did you use a rubber?” Ty’s ole nosy ass inquired. He stayed in someone else’s business besides his own. 

“Erm.. Yeah” I thought out loud. “The first time…” I looked around. 

“Well, meet daddy Brown.” Honey chimed in. 

“GET THE FUCK OUT!” I pointed towards the door. 

“Why he wanna get mad when the truth come out?” Ty asked Honey on their way to the front door. “Don’t you know the truth will set you free nigga?” 

“Don’t you know staying out of other niggas business is better for your health?” I poked.

“Nope… My doctor aint told me that” Ty said in the doorframe. 

“Get the hell out !” 

“I’mma be an Uncle Bae” Ty shouted to Honey before flashing a smile to me and leaving the door wide the hell open. 

“What the fuck ever” I mumbled under my breath, allowing the thought to drift to the back of my mind. I couldn’t stand myself I was so sleepy. I marched towards the front door, slamming and locking that bitch up tight. I couldn’t even make it to the room before I gave up the battle against sleep, and crashed on the couch. 

Rihanna

3:45pm

“Aye, let me get that bottle of henny” I slurred.I’d just stepped in the damn party, and I was piss faced drunk. But I couldn’t care less. At this point this was the only cure for my anger. Where the fuck had my life gone? “Psh to the birds” I finished the thought out loud. 

I don’t even think I went home… Well I don’t remember at least. All I remember is hearing about this rave or some shit this rich ass white kid was having. Might as well show my face for the liquor. 

“Rihanna!” A basic ass asian bitch ran up to me. “I love you! I am your biggest fan!” 

“Shut the fuck up and choke on my dick” I shut her shit down and walked away with the whole bottle of Hennessy. This little kick back house party get together weren’t shit. These little ass kids thought they could turn up. “Yo Mijo.” I shouted into the phone.

“What?” 

“Im at this party over on Crenshaw. Come through and bring 50 bottles of whatever. I’ll pay you back my nigga” I tried to make the shit sound as clear as possible; but with me downing a half a bottle of sky by myself, I was beyond tipsy and beyond drunk. 

“If I gotta bring 50 bottles, it damn sure don’t sound like its a coo ass party! Where the fuck are you Rob?” Mijo’s whining was starting to anger the shit outta me. 

“You gone bring the bottles or not?” I spoke angrily. Bring em or don’t bring em. I don’t have time for no lame as explanation like you my mother or Oprah or some shit. 

“Rihanna where are you?” 

“Die you fucking cunt ass bitch” I hung the phone up without a care for his response. I was angry. Mad at the world. So mad that I retreated to drugs and alcohol. “Yo, white bitch?” I reached out towards the white girl who was walking past me. 

“Erm.” The white girl was offended. Clearly. “Who are you talking to?” 

“You hoe! Now answer my questions” I stumbled onto her. “Don’t fucking touch me you stank pussy goblin looking bitch.” 

“What the fuck ever” she tried to march away but I snatched her hair up.  

“Listen to me!” I whispered in her ear. “Where is the weed at?” she pointed to a room down a crowded ass hallway. “This better be it or imma” i accidentally burped in her face, causing me to laugh, and her to gag. 

“Disgusting!” She shrieked before running away. 

“Thank you hoe” I trudged down the hallway. The vibration from my phone took me out of my disgusting humor momentarily. 

Honey C: Aye, did you see the tweets? 

Me: Fuck you talkin about?

Honey C: Liliana bashing yo ass on twitter

Me: Forreal?

Chris

I stood there in pure amazement as I watched Liliana bash Rih upside her head. I had never seen Liliana beat nobody ass like this. Part of me was attracted, because she can stand up for herself; but another part made me question how dangerous getting so close to someone I barely know is. I couldn’t understand how I had gotten so close to Liliana so fast. 

“Don’t you ever fucking threaten my damn life, in my damn home! I invited you, I tried to be friends, but you gone fuck me over? Bitch I ought to off yo big forehead having ass” Liliana began to kick Rih in the head, but I quickly snatched her up. “Let me go! LET ME GO DAMMIT!” I held her in my grip tighter. She screamed and kicked, no lie some of them shits hurt like hell, but my arms remained constricted. 

Mijo checked on Rihanna as she laid on the floor, cursing. Her accent thicker than I’d ever heard.  

“Ha,” Robyn chuckled evilly. “You really think I was friends with you? When you have the only thing in my world that money can’t buy? Ha. Silly bitch.” Rih got up from the ground and pushed through this newly formed crowd of people.

“Damn Lil mama” D’marcus began at Lili as she still sat fuming in my arms. “I thought daddy taught you better than that?” 

“Daddy?” I questioned. “I hope you don’t think you’re talking to my girl?”

“Fuck you mean your girl?” 

“Na bruh I should ask you the same question b” Alex stepped forward. 

“How you niggas even find out about this party?” Mijo came to my side. 

“Don’t worry bout that.” Alex disregarded Mijo. In my arms, I felt Liliana’s body shift. 

“Let go of me Chris” she spoke calmly. I looked at all the faces in the room.  Emily, Kae, D’marcus, Mijo, Alex. This was the time where Liliana’s ass needed to start answering some questions. 

“Where you going?” I asked Lili as she passed through the crowd. 

“To bed” she continued to walk. “All y’all can get the fuck out too” the slam of the door made the ladies jump. 

“Lili wait” Alex ole sap ass went running behind Lili. 

“You lucky breezy” D’marcus stepped forward to me. “Mommy  was gone off you tonight” he nudged his head towards Emily. 

“Emily’s ass” I pointed to her and threw my head back in the biggest fit of laughter ever. “Nigga fuck that prune pussied bitch.” 

“Okay” he shrugged nonchalantly as he grabbed Emily and they walked up the stairs leaving Mijo, Kae, and I down here. 

“Don’t take him lightly” Mijo said. 

“Why? Ain’t nobody scared of your brother bro” 

“I’m just saying kid. Watch out. Nice seeing you Kae.” Mijo addressed Kae as he made his way out the basement. 

“Why you here? Ain’t you supposed to be in New York? You finally following yo damn dream. But you want to come back and fuck up what I got.” 

“What do you have Chris? You never said it was over! You just think that you can just pick any random bitch out the bunch and be like you’re mine. Fuck the other shit I have with my actual GIRLFRIEND” Kae yelled. 

“It’s business.” 

“Oh forreal my nigga? It’s business? If it really was business, you wouldn’t have fucked the bitch, nor would you be living with her ass.” 

“How do you know?” I asked. How the hell she find out about all that?

“I didn’t, but you made it clear. Why do you always try to hurt me Chris?” Kae shook her head as her voice quivered. “Every fucking time! It’s Rihanna or Liliana. Man fuck you. I hope yo dick fall off. Get on my damn nerves” 

“Damn. Don’t be bitter” I chuckled. I knew I was being a complete ass, but that’s the only way I could get over her and accept my new place in life. I had lost love for Karrueche. I was losing love for Rih. But my position with Liliana was… I don’t know.  

“Bitter? Nigga I-” Kae went to curse me, but stopped and chuckled at herself. I raised my eyebrow in her amusement. “Chris” she laughed again. “It’s terribly hard to get though a brick ass wall. Have a good life.” Kae stated simply before turning on her heel and clacking away. 

I couldn’t believe she’d allowed me to be an ass without any back lash. She was over me. And a sigh of relief had rushed over me. All I need was to be free of Robyn and I could focus on the current relationship I’m in. 

I raced up the stairs, shutting and locking the door behind causing the wall to slip into place. 

By now it was 15 till 6. So the dj was packing his shit and everyone was filing out or passed out. 

“Yo y’all gotta leave” I said to some slumped out white girl. The bitch was irresponsive so I got security to drag her out. 

The floor was sticky as shit. I was tired. But I knew Lili wouldn’t like it if the house was dirty when she woke up from the wack ass mood she was just in. 

“Yo Ty, can you and honey stay over and help me clean?” I asked before honey and Ty could walk out the front. 

“Huh?” Ty turned around. 

“You heard me nigga” I yelled. 

“Forget that shit!” He retorted as he turned around. 

“Man Ty stay here and help yo nigga out” Honey came around the corner. “I’ll help you out Breezy” 

“Thank you. We just gone wait till everybody to get outta here” 

“Why you always volunteering me for some shit!” Ty smacked his lips.

“Shut cho lazy ass up!” Honey and I yelled.

I laughed and walked away as Ty went on a chewed honey out.

*** 

“Chris!” I heard Honey yell, but didn’t know where the hell she was. “Christopher?” She spoke this time as she came around the corner 

“Yeah?” I asked. Me and Ty had been cleaning the pool area and the living room. I can’t never have a party at my house unless the cleaning crew can come early in the morning. 

“I found something on one of the bedroom doors with your name on it” Honey handed a white envelope over with my name written in cursive. “I didn’t open it cause I ain’t tryna see some shit that wasn’t meant for me.” 

“Uh, coo? I guess” I kept my eyes focused on the letter. I ripped it open to a note that said: 

“You’re never safe, Thanks for the invite to your home; lovely place” 

“The fuck?”

Rihanna

*9 hours later* 

“I’m done with this bitch!” I yelled to Mijo. I had to much pent up anger towards my busted lip and bruises on my face. “It’s her head.” I spat disgustedly at Mijo.

I rolled out to his apartment to discuss some future plans, but my mind remained on last night. 

“Robyn, maybe it’s time to move on.”

“Huh? Move on? Fuck that shit, it’s over. I’m going for her head. I’m going to punish her. 

Alex

“I’m not giving up” I answered my brother Emanuel. “She’s more than a pussy. That’s my heart. We already had a future planned.” 

“It don’t sound like boo is sticking to her half.” Emanuel sat down on the sofa across from me. The last resort in LA was him. Yeah it was dangerous, but if I get what I want, it’ll work out. 

“She’s handling business.” I said absentmindedly. 

“Mmhm” Emanuel said as he snatched the PS3 controller from my hand.

“What chu tryna say nigga? Huh? You tryna say my lady ain’t  flying straight” I asked lightly. 

“If the shoe fits..” Emanuel paused the game. 

“We’ll why did I spend the night with her last night?” 

Chris

I checked my watch for the fifth time. Liliana ass still wasn’t here. The last performance of the night was in 5 minutes and this nigga was MIA. I called her phone 5 fucking times, she had to have seen my call.

“Yo Ty, tell the dj to cancel the last performance” I rose from my place on the couch where I sat next to Ty and Honey.

“Why nigga?” Honey turned her head to see what Ty and I were talking about.

“Cause I needa go find Lili” I quickly composed her a text.

“Oooh baby mama gone AWOL?” Ty’s loud ass forced the attention of the area on me.

“Just do as I say nigga” I said low enough for Ty and Honey to hear before walking away.

Kae

I was having a goods ass time with Alex. His humor, his charm, not to mention that swag; made him completely irresistible.

“Aye ma, in all seriousness,” Alex broke the bubbly atmosphere between us two. “What brought you here?” A lump in my throat swelled as I saw Chris out my side eye. I’d noticed Chris’ presence unlike Alex. He was waiting for my answer. Shit I bet he even wanted to ask me himself.

“It’s a party” I shrugged “why else would I be here?”

“How do you know Lili” he pursued.

“I don’t, Emily brought me here” I said honestly, Chris smacked his lips which made Alex turn around.

“Forreal nigga?” Chris addressed Alex. “You REALLY don’t know what she’s here for?” A chuckle escaped Chris’ lips. “She’s here cause Emily brought her here” Alex took a step to Chris.”Yup that vindictive bitch did. Only because Emily wants me to chase Kae ole plain ass, so that Emily can get back to sucking Ty’s dick”

“Don’t talk about her like that Chris” I warned. Chris puckered his lips at me.

“Oh don’t worry bout that sweetie, Alex is here for Liliana ass.”

“Shut the fuck up” Alex retorted.

“Ha,” Chris chuckled before leaving. Fucking asshole.

Mijo I watched D’marcus from a corner of the massive house. He had some white looking bitch wrapped in his arms. D’marcus pointed a finger across the room. I followed it and found Chris coming out of the kitchen. D’marcus began walking towards Chris.

“Yo breezy” I caught up with Chris.

“Mijo” he said coldly.

“Look you’re my nigga, I don’t want to let no bitches come between me and my bro… Why do I feel like I’m saying this shit for the second time!” I yelled.

“Turn around”

“What?” I asked to Chris’ weird ass demand

“Just turn around right quick” he smacked his lips.

“Okay nigga..” I waited for him a few seconds but he never told me to turn back around. When I did, Chris was in front of a door.

“Nigga come on”

D’marcus

“Where the hell they going Emily?” I asked in pursue of Mijo and Chris.

“Nigga I don’t know, this ain’t my house!” Emily said under my arm. “

Aye Em I needa talk to you” a voice said behind me. Emily stopped walking. I turned around and looked at Karrueche as if she was crazy.

“D’marcus?” She questioned.

“How you know D’marcus?” Emily asked Kae.

“That’s Mijo’s brother” Kae told Emily. Emily sent a confused face towards me in efforts for me to explain.

“Look just follow me,” I improvised. “I know a place where we can go and talk if y’all would just follow me.”

“Alright y’all go there right quick and imma get my friend right quick” Kae said.

“Coo” I said as I dragged Emily with me towards the door. The only reason why I needed Emily was because she was the best gun man I had back when she was tricking. Had her in my army after Liliana left. Of course she wasn’t as good as Liliana with the execution, but she could kill a nigga with no remorse. And getting Chris alone was the best way to have a marksman do her job.

Kae

“Thanks for the drink” I smiled at Alex. I knew I wasn’t supposed to let other niggas make my drink at parties, but hey, Alex could be my new Chris.

“I wish I could talk to you one on one without this loud ass music.”

“We’ll my friends just went into this secluded area if you want to go?”

“Hells yeah” he stood off the counter. I led Alex into the door that I watched Dmarcus and Emily walk through, closing it tight behind up.

“You hear that?” I asked Alex as the sound of shit breaking was heard.

“Lili?” Alex asked as we walked further down the stairs and saw Rihanna getting fucked up by Liliana.

O.o?

Kamary 

“What the fuck are we gonna do Mijo! We not together no more” I said as I unpacked my things into the guest suite of Mijo’s condo. 

“How’d you fuck up!” he yelled. 

“Nigga I didn’t ! He was talking to Kae’s Mama” I sat defeated on the bed. 

“I gotta idea” Mijo sat down on the bed. 

“What?” 

“We gotta ride out” he looked at me with a defeated expression. 

“On her mom?” I asked, dumbfounded. 

“She’s not fucking up my plan and money so I’ll have all these people tryna kill me… Hells Naw” he said bluntly. “Grab yo chopper”

Delano

“iight… What I gotta do?” I closed Lili’s door. 

“Come to my room” 

“What kinda friend you talking bout” I shouted. 

“An actual human being! Witcho nasty ass” Breh and I laughed. This is how our relationship needed to be. Fun nshit. 

“When you need me to swing through” 

“Right now would be coo” 

“iight babe… Daddy’s coming!” I hung the phone up before she could even protest. “Yo J, I’m out” I peaked my head back into Liliana’s dorm. She nodded her head quickly before whoever was on the other line sent her into a laughing fit.  

“Coo D, love you” She said, breaking away from the other conversation. 

Liliana 

“On a serious note, I’m sorry for coming at you crazy in New York. And I would love it if we could squash any type of beef going between us.” Rihanna’s accent was thicker than a muhfucking snicker. But she was coo enough to come to me and apologize for something I wasn’t even thinking about. 

“Girl, I wasn’t even thinking about that. And I’m sorry if you thought I was beefing.” 

“Thank you girl… But, I called you to ask if you wanted to fly out to LA and record some shit with me for my album” 

“Forreal?” I tried to play down my excitement. Getting on with Chris Brown and Rihanna, two of my favorite artist, was dope as shit. Fame is getting closer than I could even imagine. 

“No lie! But of course I’ll wait for when you get out of school. I don’t want to interrupt your plans or anything” 

“Thank you… I was bouta ask you bout that. I’ll just hit you up when I get out… Sound good?” 

“You already know… Text me tho boo” 

“No doubt love.” 

“Talk to you later” 

“iight” 

“Bye” Rih and I hung up at the same time. 

“GOD IS GOOD!” I yelled. 

“All the time” I heard a voice respond behind me. I turned around and Rob, Delano’s homeboy, was in the door. 

“You was bouta get murked… Quit playing” I laughed. 

“Mmhm whatever” he laughed back. “Yo Delo bouta have a session in his room, tryna hop on?” 

“You already know” 

Rihanna

“She fell for it” I gushed to Mijo on the phone. 

“Mmhm” he said uninterested. The negro who was always talking about I don’t ever do nothing for the operation, wasn’t interested when I finally did something. 

“Why you answer the phone if you not gone care about what I’m saying” I said angrily. 

“Cause I’m busy” he yelled. 

“So why answer the phone you dumb fuck !” 

“Look, call Chris and get buddy buddy with him too” Mijo hung up in my face. 

“Bitch!” I yelled back. I grabbed my phone, dialing Chris’ number… But I was sent directly to voicemail. 

Chris 
“Wassup” I said as I finished greeting Delano’s crew or whatever. To be honest, these niggas was country and weird as fuck. But if they can help produce some dope ass tracks, I’m coo.

“Is there anythang you want? Got hoochies outside willing to do whatever” The nigga named Rob asked. 

“Ask them if they can bring we some green cuh” I sat back in the desk chair. 

“You already know we got that” He said as he rolled out a fat ass ziplock bag. 

“Hot cheetos and a Vitamin Water and I’m straight then” This shit might be successful. 

*** 

“Don’t need your name girl… Don’t need your number. This might seem strange but, can’t help but wonder…” I sang into the mic. I knew how to finish this song. And she was my inspiration. “… What it would be like. Just to be with you. Don’t need to move fast. Just want to think it through.” 

“Hold on Chris” Delano stopped the track. 

“Wassup?” I asked. That’s when she walked in. Her hair sits freely on her face; yeah she had make up on, but it looked almost natural. From the time she’d walked in, she’d sent glances to me. Dapping the homies up, our eyes locked, she blushed. She sat down in the chair next to Delano. Who greeted her with a hug, then focused back on the computer. 

“You ready” he asked. 

“Huh” I continued to be awe struct. 

“Sing nigga” she covered her mouth as she laughed like she’d never seen or met me before. 

“Yeah, play it back” I cued Delano. 

The beat began and my focus was 100% on her. 

“Don’t need your name girl, don’t need your number. This might seem strange but, can’t help but wonder. What it would be like, just to e with you. Don’t need to move fast… Just want to think it through…”

Liliana
“Ooooh… Yooou… Doooo… Yooou” I sang the last touches for Calypso. 

“Thanks J-Note” Delo said before I removed the headphones. 

“What the hell y’all been staring at the whole time” Mario said between Mine and Chris’ stares. From the moment I’d walked in, I had been checking Chris out. I had meant to stop staring so hard, but I couldn’t fight it. 

“Nothing Mario” I checked the time. “I gotta go y’all, I got 3 tests in the am” 

“Alright J” Everyone but Chris greeted. I began to my dorm when I heard Chris tell the guys to take a break. 

“Wait up Lili” Chris said from behind me. I continued to walk without looking back. Soon enough, I felt two firm hands around my waist. “I said hold up” 

“So” I replied smartly. 

“Is that an attitude I hear” Chris held me back from moving. 

“Is it?” I said just before he’d snatched me off my feet and flipped me onto his shoulder. 

“Put me down Chris” I yelped. 

“What’s the magic word” 

“Throw up on your back!” I yelled. 

“Oh hells naw” he quickly flipped me back on my feet. 

“I can’t see!” 

“Sorry ma” He kissed my cheek and walked me back to my dorm.

Delano 
“Yo can y’all go see if Rome in his dorm?”I asked Mario & Rob. 

“Nigga that’s all the way in gateway” Mario whined. 

“I don’t care” I responded. 

“We gotta cross campus to get over there” 

“I don’t give a fuck ! Go to his dorm and stay there”

“Psh whatever then Nigga. Come on Rob” He and Mario left the room, slamming the door. 

“Kae?” 

“What Delano” I could see the annoyance in her face from over the phone. 

“Look, I just seen your dude boo’d up” I told her despite her stank ass attitude. 

“I don’t have no boo” 

“Soo.. Chris Brown ain’t your man?” 

“Nope”

Chris

“You’re such a goof” Lili punched my chest. We were laid up in her bed watching an episode of Fresh Prince and I was clownin about Aunt Viv’s wig. 

“I’m just saying. Get your hair done like that and I’m outro” 

“I think it’s cute for her style” Lili and I both fell quiet as the show resumed. I felt a hole being burned in the side of my face. I looked down and met Liliana’s glare. 

“What” I asked. Lili mumbled something lowly and a gloss grew quickly over her eyes. “What?” 

“This is what it should be like” she sat up and turned her body away from me. 

“This is what what should be like?” I didn’t have a clue as to what the fuck she was talking bout. 

“A good relationship should be like this” Lili rested her head in the nook of my arm. We sat in silence. I thought about what she meant. Where my life was, where my goals were, and how I’d get there. 

I couldn’t see myself becoming better when I was with Kae. When I was with Rih, I focused more, but she was too serious and sneaky when she didn’t get what she want. But Lili, she was just a chill ass girl. Without a doubt she’ll hold me down and she’ll keep me in place without being over baring. 

“So why can’t this be a perfect relationship” I led on. 

“I- I don’t know” She sniffled, letting out a small sigh. I looked down to Lili and her face was puffy, her eyes red and filled with tears. 

“What’s wrong” I folded my arm so Lili was facing me. 

“I still- I’m- I still love Alex” her cries began to get heavier. 
 
“So… Why you crying?” 

“Cause” 

“What ma? Whatever it is, I swear you can tell me” I wiped the falling tears. 

“When you left” 

“When I left what?” 

“After you and Alex fought or whatever” 

“And?” I wanted to yell at her to hurry the fuck up and say it, but I know she needed time. 

“You- Erm- When I came back here, Alex had completely destroyed my shit. We got into this fat ass argument. And he ended up hitting me” 

Chris

“What are you going to do now?”

“Shit if I know” I took a swig of water. I’d been chillin low-key with Brehana for a couple of hours. It felt good to be outside of Lili’s dorm. We were sat in some honky tonk ass restaurant in the middle of nowhere. We’d been here for about an hour and all the white folk were staring. I was ready for any type of shit to go down out here.

“Chris, have you ever though about keeping you and Lili’s situation simply work” she suggested.

“Yeah, she was the one who purposed that weak ass idea and the first one to break down. I really wouldn’t be out here until she called me talking about she needed to see me” Brehana shook her head with a low chuckle.

“She’s fucking weird”

“What chu hollin? You ain’t the one dealing with this” I laughed.

“Y’all both got the situation fucked up” Brehana glanced up from her phone at me.

“What?” My eyebrows furrowed.

“Don’t think I don’t know about your equally indecisive ass” she moved her attention from her phone back to me. “What’s really going on between you, Kae, and Rih?”

“Nothing” I said simply. “Why y’all keep asking that?”

“Because you keep responding with a bullshit answer” Brehana stated bluntly.

“Excuse me?” I asked.

“Your answer is bullshit and you know it Chris. You fucks with Kae cause you live with her in Cali, You fucks with Rih cause y’all was just on a date, and You fucks with Liliana cause you here right now, getting in and out of fights with her fiancé. What are you doing with your life?”

“Kae and I are on a hiatus, I needed answers from Rih that I never got, and Lili… Lili my girl and my business partner.”

“That’s where you got life fucked up… Never mix business with pleasure.”

Ty

“Babe what you doing after this?” I asked Honey with my eyes glued on the television screen. When the meeting was over, we went back to her place for some QT. That good shit.

“I didn’t know I had to leave” leaned her head in-front of my view of the screen.

“Quit cheating!” I yelled as she crossed the finish line of Mario Kart before I did. We been playing PS3 all day, ordered Dominoes, and I let Honey enjoy my company.

“Play again?” she giggled.

“Not with yo cheating ass!” I turned the game console off and for a moment, Honey and I sat in silence. “What takes up most of your time?” I asked before opening the box of swishers and pulling one out. I cut a small slit down the middle of it and emptied it. Grabbing the dime bag out my pocket and crushed a some of it up, placing it in the hollowed swisher. I gently passed the blunt to Honey.

“Work.” She said before she licked the swisher paper closed, passing it back for me to light.

“What do you do then… Cause I coulda swore a month ago that you was a rapper, not a worker” I asked rhetorically before taking a drag.

“You know I can’t tell you!”

“Why not? I thought you was my rider cuh?” I took one last drag before passing to her.

“Because you’re not gone feel the same way towards me”

“Tell me and we’ll see how I feel afterwards” I looked over to her.

“I’m a dirty worker” her reply was vague. I smacked her lips, giving her a side eye. “What?” she asked.

“Nigga not with your ass being vague right now when I’m tryna be serious”

“I help people out by doing dirty work” her posture was noticeably uncomfortable.

“Why you tensing?”

“Why you asking so many questions” Honey argued.

“Why you beating around the muhfucking bush and not being real with a nigga”

“Cause I don’t have to tell you everything” Honey stood up.

“Forreal?” I asked.

“Yeah, while you’re at it, could you get your things and leave?” Honey glared blankly at me.

“Oh shit” I covered my mouth with an overdramatic gasp “ You kicking people out now? So it’s like that now?”

“Yup” Her voice was low and serious.

“Got chu ma” I got up, grabbed my things, and left.

Kae

“Dad, I’m out!” I yelled from the foyer. It had been over 2 weeks since that last time Chris and I talked. Honestly, everything seemed to work well when he wasn’t here. My stress levels were down, I was smiling more, and damn sure more productive.

“Hold on boo” My father scaled the spiral staircase that divided the foyer from the rest of the house. “There’s something I need to tell you”.

“Wassup pops” I kissed his cheek.

“I’ve been talking to your mother for a while now, mutually, we’ve come to the conclusion that maybe we should try to make things work. At least one more go.” He slid his hands into his pockets, rocking from the balls of his feet to his heels.

“Nuh uh” I dropped my bags. He nodded and I jumped on him. “OH MY GOODNESS” I cried. Hell yes! I thought , finally Kamary ass gone be out! “Wait” I backed away from him. “What about Kamary”.

“When she comes home, she’ll hear the news” My father shrugged.

“YESS!” I hugged my father one last time before I finally got out of the house.

In the driveway, Kamary had just hopped out of her car. The fattest grin ever laced my face. As I passed, the smell of weed and the cologne that Mijo always wore was stronger than a muhfucka.

“Wassup Bitch?” I greeted.

“Erm excuse me? Can you repeat that?” She halted.

“HEY BIIIIITCH” I smiled.

“Who the fuck you talking to?”

“Yo replacement ass!”

“Who’s a replacement?”

“You’ll see hoe” I sauntered to my taxi. Back to NY I go.

Kamary

“Man, what the hell is your daughter talking about” I stormed into the house. “Sweetie, I’m so tired of trying to be nice to her.”

“You don’t have to anymore”

“What?” I gasped. Thank GOD he was coming to his senses.

“You don’t have to” He said again.

“Thank goodness baby” I wrapped my arms around his neck for a hug.

“But one thing” he said as he released me and began to walk away.

“Anything doll” I cheered.

“Pack your things…”

“Uh huh?”

“And get the hell out of my house… We through” He said as he shut his room door, locking it. “And if you ain’t out in 10 minutes… I’ll have the cops come for yo ass… HOLLA”

Brehana

“What you bouta do?” I turned down the music so Chris could hear me.

“I was hoping to just chill with you until she call me” he responded nonchalantly.

“What nigga?” I turned to him as we reached the stoplight.

“You heard me” he chuckled.

“Chris you better call her ass!”

“Whatchu mean? You not gone let me stay with you” Chris laughed harder.

“You tryna mess up 2 relationships huh? If Delano…”

“…Delano?” Chris interrupted.

“Yeah” I focused my eyes on the road.

“I know that nigga”

“HOW?” I yelled.

“Damn girl” he laughed. “That’s Kae’s bestfriend’s brother”

“Damn so y’all all connected.”

“I guess” he shrugged. I turned the music back up and continued back to the dorms.

***

“Go rent a studio out and make some shit” I suggested. Chris and I were chilling in my dorm room watching Spongebob, his suggestion, not mine.

“Shit I should huh. I ain’t did no shit for myself in a while.” He got up. “But I ain’t got no producer or nothing”

“Bet you if you emailed some of your favorite producers and if I asked Delano, you would get some shit done”

“I need you on a daily ma. Thank you” he turned his phone on and began typing some shit.

“Yo Lano, can you help out a friend of mine”

Liliana

“Man D, I wanna fuck him up so damn bad” I stormed around the dorm room.

After Alex’s bold ass left, I called up a search party for his ass but he wasn’t nowhere to be found.

Lucky thing I had homies out here who cared enough to help me clean up. When everything was done, I’d called Delano & asked him if he would go shopping with me, seeing as Brehana’s ass didn’t answer.

“I woulda beat his ass whatchu hollin?” Delano began to flap out the bed sheet, laying it over my new mattress.

“Next time I see him, on sight, I’m fucking him up D” I began to sob. Delano came over and wrapped me in his arms, rubbing my back. “Fuck that nigga”

“Don’t worry J-Note, that nigga gone get it” He reassured.

“Thank you for being here” I broke away from his hug to dry my eyes.

“Always” He smiled and went back to fixing my bed. Knocks came on the door. I shot Delano a look, but he shrugged, so I waved him over to the door just in case shit was bouta go down.

“Uhm I got 2 pepperoni and sausage pizzas for Delano” the pizzaman said.

“How yo dumb ass gone forget you ordered pizza” I smacked Delano on the head.

“I was concerned about yo ass”

“Truu”

“So who gone pay this 22.35” The pizzaman asked.

“I’ll go half” I looked at Delano.

“Coo” He smiled. “Hold up player”

I dug in my wallet and grabbed 11.35 out cause I know Delano’s ass don’t care about change.

“Here” I gave Delano the money.

“Thanks nigga” Delano said as he shut the door.

“You a fool”

***

“When’s the last time Breh and y’all talked” I wiped my mouth with a napkin.

“Like 45 minutes before you told me what happened”

“Damn dog, I cramped yo came. My bad”

“It’s cool love cause it ain’t yo fault” Delano grabbed the last slice of pizza from my hand.

“Asshole! I joked.

“Yup” he smacked on his pizza.

“Yo, your phone’s ringing” I handed him his phone from the side table.

“Aye whaddup babe” Delano pointed to the door, excusing himself.

I heard the sound of my phone ringing from my desk, I quickly ran over to retrieve it.

“Hello” I greeted the unknown caller.

“Liliana?”

“Um yeah… Who’s this?”I asked.

“It’s Rihanna… We needa talk”

Mijo
“You’re close with Ty and Chris right?” I asked as I took a sip of coffee from my mug.Savanna arrived to a table where Honey, Sophia, Kamary, Rih, and I were sat. 

With a confused look, she answered my question with a small yes.

“We need you to find out all their moves and report them back to us.” Sophia leaned back in her chair. 

“What’s all this for” She searched the room with pleading eyes. 

“There is a hit set out for someone… You can keep Michael and Christopher safe if you follow everything we say” Kamary added. 

“Don’t I know you?” Savonna pointed to Kamary, but she hid her face. 

“Nonetheless, follow what we say, or more than one person gets hurt”Honey said.

“What if I don’t follow?” 

“Then your father will know about your personal life AND, you will feel the regret when Chris or Ty are killed in the fire” I added angrily. This fighting back and fourth is useless… Bitch do what we say already. 

“Okay” Savonna hung her head low. 

“First thing first, June. We need Kae,Liliana, Chris, and Ty to hit up Kamary’s Party”

Chris
***2 Weeks Later*** 

“When are you leaving negro” Liliana laughed as she strolled in with a bag of McDonalds. I’d been chilling in her dorm since that night two weeks ago. 

“I like this vacating thing. Being M.I.A ain’t bad” I told her as I took the bags and drinks from her hand. “Besides, where your dorm mate nigga?” 

“Hell if I no” She replied before taking a fat ass bite of her McGriddle. 

“Damn chica, it ain’t that big!” I joked as she finished her sandwich in two bites.

“Shut up nigga” she punched me “I’m hungry” liliana said lowly before pulling out two more sandwiches, hashbrowns, and a wrap.

***
“I just want to love, you” Liliana and I sang in harmony. We’d created this dope ass beat and recorded it all on her MacBook … 

“Sounds nice” I said as I added a few more touches to the song. Liliana smiled as she sat down on the bed.

All day long Lili looked grayish and constantly complained that her stomach was killing her. 

She laid back on the bed and quickly sprang up, sprinting towards the garbage can. 

“Eww” I winced as the smell of throw up filled the air. 

“I’m so sorry” Lili said in between heaves. I walked over to her and held her hair back  although I was ready to throw up my damn self. 

“It’s okay” I gagged. “Let it out babe” I walked over to the mini fridge and got her a bottle of water. Liliana wiped her mouth with a napkin and thank me as I handed her the water. 

“Can you see if I have crackers?” she asked. 

“Yeah, but what’s that gone help” I dug through a box of snacks and found the saltines. 

“The sodium helps settle your stomach.” 

“Word?” I handed her the crackers. 

“Yes. I’m bouta go brush my teeth iight?” Liliana asked in the doorway. “Need anything?” 

“Naa” 

Liliana 

I walked down the hallway towards the bathroom with my tote. People tried to start conversation, but I could not let my stank ass breath burn off they nostril hair. That’s just disrespectful. 

***

I was on my way back to the dorm when my phone rang. I checked the caller ID, Alejandro. 

“Hey bae” I said excitedly. 

“I see you” His reply was cheerful. In an instant, I froze. 

“How, Where?” I looked around and didn’t see him anywhere. 

“Let’s play a game”He said confidently. 

“Now you know you sound creepy right” I asked. Swear I was sweating bullets in this moment. 

“You look cute in your leggings showing off ya ass like that” he laughed. 

“Nigga where the hell are you?” 

“Aquí” I heard his voice from behind me. Strong arms hugged my body tightly and kisses were sent down my neck. 

“Babe” My body tensed. 

“Why you ain’t hit a nigga up in the hospital?” He asked as we were face to face. 

“You didn’t get the balloons?” I asked about the whole basket I sent last week. 

“Yeah, but that still ain’t your voice doll” he placed his hands on my waist and pulled me closer. He wore my favorite fragrance, Polo Ralph Lauren 3. The thought of Chris left my mind. 

“Well were here now mi amor” I leaned closer into him. 

“Well let’s take this somewhere more private” He kissed me out of my trance. 

“I wish” I said ducking another kiss. “My roommate is here” 

“Let me put my bags in your room and we can go out to eat then.” He began towards my dorm. 

I sent Chris a text saying Alex is on his way. 
He replied with So What. 

“FUCK” I muttered as I ran to catch up with Alex. 

Alex reached for the door, but it swung open revealing Chris. To me, everything seemed to move in slow motion as both Chris and Alex stared at each other. 

Cheers of Chris’ name filled the hallway and swarms of people ran past me. 

Awkward to say the least. 

Brehana

“Please Baby” Delano said from the other side of my door. For the past two weeks this nigga has been on me like white on fucking rice. 

“No” I repeated tirelessly. 

“Please let me speak to you man! I’ve been busting my ass trying to impress you, trying to get you speak to me, literally stalkin yo ass! Baby PLEASE let me inside” he banged on the door. 

I contemplated the idea before finally letting him in. His eyes widened then shrank in confusion. 

My face was blank and unreadable so I understood his confusion. 

“What you want to talk about?” I smacked my hand on my thigh and shifted my weight onto my back leg. 

“Can we have a private conversation?” 

“No” 

“Alright” Delano shrugged before falling silent.

“Um hello?” I said impatiently. 

“I’m sorry” 

“Oh forreal” I said absentmindedly. I pulled my phone out my pocket, and a text from liliana popped to the top. 

Liliana- 911 ! Come to my dorm room now cuh! 

“Hold on D… We gotta talk about this later” I grabbed my room key and pushed passed Delano. 

“Where you going” I heard him call from behind so I picked my pace up. 

***

After pushing through this fat ass crowd, I finally caught a glimpse of Alex & Chris squared up and talking shit. Lili just stood there in awe. 

“What’s going on lil” I snapped her back. 

“Man” She shook her head. “So I was coming back from the bathroom right, and out of nowhere, I get this call from Alex who ends up surprising me. Chris been here for two weeks right,” My jaw dropped instantly. She nodded her head in acknowledgment “So I was trying to talk Alex out of putting his suitcases in my room, but he didn’t listen to me, and when he went to open the door, Chris opened it for him. They’ve been talking shit for a couple minutes. I really hope-“ 

The crowd began to shout as Alex threw the first punch.

Liliana

Why? I thought to myself as I watched Alex and Chris beat each other’s ass. Wasn’t no one bouta break them up. That’s the number one rule of street fighting, but they really needed to be split up. This would be more bad publicity for Chris and neither one of them needed to go to jail. 

I looked around for cameras, but weren’t none in this hallway, so I pulled the fire alarm. 

Water started pouring and all the ratchet ass bitches went running for cover hollin they weave was gone get fucked up. Too bad they shit already looked like yarn. 

Chris and Alex split up and ran separate ways. I went in my room, grabbing my car keys phone charger, so Brehana and I took the closest exit towards my car. 

*** 

“I always run” I turned the music down and rolled the windows up. 

“You just need time” Brehana consoled. 

“The world ain’t gone stop for me” I argued as if she’d said something offensive, 

“So what you bouta do?” I shrugged. 

“I just gotta turn around and face my problems…” I took the nearest exit from the freeway then reentered on the opposite side. “I just gotta face reality.” 

*** 

“You sure?” Brehana asked one last time as we finally met up with my dorm room. We’d walked all the way there without any glimpse of Alex or Chris. No text, call, nothing. 

“Yeah girl. See you tomorrow” I said as I watched her walk down the hall. “Thank you” 

“You know I got yo back like chiroprac ! ” she joked. 

I opened my room door to the lights on and the room trashed. Alex stood there smoldering in the corner. 

I stood in the doorway, trying to hold my own anger back. 

Everything, when I say everything I mean the ENTIRE place was broken in half. 

My computer laid in 2 pieces, my bed, mini fridge, clothes, every fucking thing. 

“What, the fuck, did you do” I spoke in a slow and low tone, trying to mask my anger. 

“What the fuck did YOU do” he bantered back.

“This isn’t about me” 

“OH FORREAL” He yelled louder as he took a step forward into me. “THEN WHO THE FUCK IS IT ABOUT LILIANA? HUH? I BEEN IN THE HOSPITAL, AROUND NIGGAS WHO HAVE PLANS TO KILL MY ASS, WHILE YOU WAS BUDDY BUDDY WITH THE NIGGA THAT PUT ME THERE!” 

“IF YOU HADN’T POPPED OFF AT THE GUMS, THEN YA ASS WOULDN’T HAVE BEEN IN THE HOSPITAL!” 

“Oh so this is my fault?” Alex threw his hands in the air. 

“I thought you knew what this-“ 

“No bitch,” Alex interrupted. “I thought YOU knew what this was!” 

“Bitch?” I said rhetorically as I inched closer to Alex. 

“If the card fits Perra” He spat. 

“Ha! I’m a bitch?” 

“Yeah” he said proudly.

“What about your heroin addicted, alcoholic ass mother huh? What about that BITCH” I emphasized. I knew I cut Alex where it hurt cause that nigga was awe stricken for a moment before the fury ignited in his eyes. 

“You gone cut me low like that, really?” Alex and I were face to face with our foreheads touching. 

“And nigga ? What you gone do? Don’t make me get Demarcus … Better yet, don’t let me get Chris to do your fucking job and be a man!” 

A stinging burned my chin and I was sent stumbling back into the wall. A warm liquid oozed from my lips with a salty flavor. Blood. My eyes widened and swelled with tears in the realization that Alex just hit me. Before I could speak, scream or run, more fists came flying at me. All aimed at my face, each blow felt like stabs. 

My body locked itself as I took the punches. 

*** 

“YOU SEE WHAT YOU MAKE ME DO!” Alex screamed before he walked out the dorm room. 

Liliana

“Mayne let me in” I heard this country accent call from behind my door. It had been an hour since I’d stormed out of Breh’s room. I finally calmed myself down, turned on some music, and decided to unpack. I didn’t remember telling nobody to come over, so I didn’t know who the hell this was. I turned the music down and went to retrieve the door.  Cracking the door open, I smacked my lips at his presence.

“What Delano?” I said, opening the door fully. Delano looked like he’d been chilling outside my door for a minute. His body leaned against the doorframe, I could tell in his eyes that something wasn’t right. Delano was one of my sorority brothers and through sophomore year, we’d gotten really close. But after hearing what he did with Crystal’s hoe ass… I didn’t really know what to think of him.

“Can we talk” His eye’s pled. I sighed and gave myself time to think about it, eventually letting him inside. I turned around and Delano had made himself comfortable in my computer chair.

“What’s wrong” I shot directly for the point.

“I fucked up this time J-Note” Delano rested his head in his hands as he called me by his personal nickname that he’d given me when we were on line.

“What chu mean?” I asked even though I knew exactly what he was talking about.

“Jay, you know what I’m talking about.”

“I’m clueless. Puzzle me in” I said rhetorically.

“Well basically, Crystal threw me some ass, I smashed, the bitch texted me some whack shit the next day, Breh read the text, whooped the bitch’s ass, and now she not talking to me.”Delano rushed. I remained silent as I tried to piece his story and Breh’s together.

“So what do you want from me?” I asked.

“What should I do” Delano looked up at me. For some reason, a light bulb popped in my head.

“How long you been messing around with Crystal?” I inquired.

“A month I guess, why?”

“What was the reason y’all started talking?”

“Project for African American Studies” Delano’s face was confused. Damn I muttered lowly.

“Do you have any type of interest in Crystal… Like, do you want to make it more than sex?” I cringed in anticipation of this answer.

“Naa, but she coo to kick it with. It’s fun with her. Whenever Breh and I get into some shit, she help me forget the bad shit.” Delano replied. I paused a moment, thinking his answer over.

“Did you intentionally have sex with her? The first time?” I stumbled over my words as I rushed them out.

“No. Not really” He shrugged.

“So why did you have sex with her again?”

“Erm… I don’t fucking know Dr. Phil! Where the fuck you coming from with all these questions? Can you just tell me what to do.” Delano stood up. I was still frozen in my thoughts, but I shook them away so I could answer Delano’s question and get him the fuck out of here so I could solve my own shit.

“Get your priorities straight.” I said blatantly as I began rushing him out.

“Wait! What the fuck does that mean?!” Delano pressed his weight back on me, making it harder to rush him out.

“Do you want a fuck buddy who can only last…” I paused, Did I just refer to myself as a fuck buddy?

“Continue nigga” Delano urged.

“Who do you want to be with? You can only have one girl… Choose wisely!” I said blankly.

“I already know who I want! Now how do I get her to talk to me again?”

“Stalk her, be romantic… Make her talk to you” I said with one last shove and sent Delano away. I slammed my door and ran to get my phone.

“Chris” I said as he answered the phone.

“Lili” His voice was calm.

“We need to talk.”

“Again” Chris groaned.

“Yeah”

Tyga

Mijo said his goodbyes to the family, hopped in the whip, and sped off. That call from Honey got me questioning what this was about. But she had a whole lot of shit that she needed to tell me. Mom’s and Mr. Choi’s ass went to they room to do some shit that I don’t even want to fathom, leaving Savonna out here with me.

I was sat from the couch across from her, she looked dead as shit. I could tell she had surpassed her hangover. I could actually have a normal conversation with her.

“Do you remember what yo wild ass did earlier?” I said just above a whisper.

“The fuck are you talking about” She groaned.

“You basically tried to rape me” I said in a joking manner. I understood the fact that she wasn’t in the right mindset, I didn’t hold it against her. I knew the only reason she got sloppy faced wasted was because I decided to take her out to the party with me.

“Oh my gosh” Savonna gasped. “I am soo fucking sorry! I cannot drink to save my damn life” she shook her head. “What was I doing?”

“Besides stripping, forcing yourself on me, running around the house naked, AND trying to get us busted… Nothing” I got up and walked to the kitchen. I went to the fridge and pored me a glass of Orange Juice with the biggest glass we had. Orange juice with a ton of pulp was my shit. J

“I’m sorry Ty… Really” She said as I re-entered the room.

“It’s Gucci” I picked my keys up from the side table. “But I’m out… I got business to handle. If my mom ask where I’m at, tell her I’m with Chris. She love his ass for some reason” I shrugged.

Kae

“He ended up calling me a bitch, so I told him to leave” I sniffled. After Chris left, I honestly was destroyed on the inside. Our arguments have never gotten that far out of hand. I ran up to my room and locked the door. I hadn’t talked to my mom in a while, so I decided she might’ve been able to help me with this.

“How much do you need him?”  My mother asked calmly. This was not the attitude I thought she would take to it.

“He has the connections that I need.”

“Well if he has the connections, do you really think he’s going to give them to you now that you guys have blown up at each other?” She questioned. I thought about it before I began. Did I really just fuck up my career AND relationship at the same time? “Do you really love him?” My mother broke the silence.

“Yes” I said skeptically.

“Does he love you back?” I paused again. I was unsure of every answer.

“I don’t know” The tears streamed my face.

“Take a break from him. A mutual break. You work on yourself… focus on your modeling for a few weeks or so. Wait for him to make the first attempt to talk to you. When you guys finally talk, be open, think about both sides, and don’t fly off the handle!”

“Okay Ma. Thank you so much” I wiped the tears from my face.

“Any time baby. Whenever you need me, call me! I love you baby girl”

“Love you too Mom. Talk to you later”

Savonna

After Ty left, I attempted to watch TV but failed miserably. I grabbed my phone from a fold in the couch and headed to my room. My phone vibrated in my pocket and my calendar popped up.

Meeting with Mijo

May 1^st

In San Francisco

Hotel Nikko

Text Him Now For More Details

“I ain’t even got his number” I thought to myself as I shut my room door and began to crash on my bed. 5 minutes later, my phone started buzzing.

“Hello, who the fuck is this, and what do you want?” I said harshly as I answered the phone.

“Ha, you don’t read reminders that well” Mijo said smoothly into the phone. “You gone meet me tomorrow right?”

“I guess? What is this about?”

“I scratched your back, now you scratch mine” Mijo reminded me of the night he saved me from a group of niggas that tried to rape me in an alley after a party one night. Prior to me discovering Ty was my new brother, I’d known of Mijo for a while.

“Why you sound so cynical?” I asked.

“Because what I need you to do is some real ass cynical shit. You can’t back down either.”

“What you gone do” I smacked my lips.

“I have shit on you little girl. You really want your dad knowing about what you’re doing in the streets” He said with the same calm manner. I’d been dealing drugs to make money here and there so I could fill my pockets. With all the partying and drugs, my life outside the house was horrible. I never wanted my dad to be ashamed of me or what I do. So I guess whatever Mijo wanted me to do, I would have to do it.

“What time?” I said reluctantly.

“11:30 am. You need to be knocking at 11:30 am EXACTLY”

“And if I don’t” I asked.

“One of your secrets will be revealed” He hung up. I huffed and rolled over on my comforter.

Chris

“Wassup” I pressed speaker phone as I lotioned my body. I barely answered Liliana’s call in time cause I just hopped out the shower.

“What are your intentions?” Liliana jumped. This was not the same girl I’d just talked to not that long ago. Something was going on.

“With what?” I slipped into a pair of boxers and sweats, leaving my chest bare.

“With Me and with Kae” She asked bluntly.

“What are you talking about?” I asked curiously.  Lili never really cared to much about Kae, so for her to ask me about Kae really threw me off.

“What do you want to get out of this THING you and I have going on” She spat. “What feelings do you have for me, honestly?” I huffed lightly.

“Lili, I thought you wanted this shit to be business only. Why are you worried about Kae? What feelings do you have for me, honestly” I mimicked as I flipped the question back.

“Ha,” Liliana laughed. “I feel like I’m a hypocrite thanks to you.”

“What?” I asked out of genuine shock. How did she think that this shit was really my fault.

“I was suppose to give my virginity to my husband… when I got married. I cheated on Alex with you-“

“Hold up” I interjected. “Back in New York, you told me he wasn’t important. If you gave a shit about him, why’d you play him down?”

“I- I don’t-“

“If you’d told me that you didn’t want to mess around because you were serious with Alex, I would’ve respected that.”

“That would’ve been easy if you hadn’t been you” Liliana stuttered.

“Psh, what the fuck does that mean?” I felt a little offended.

“If you hadn’t been the charming ass Chris Brown that you are, I wouldn’t feel this way”

“Liliana… listen to yourself right now. You sounding mad dumb. So you telling me, If I acted like someone I wasn’t, you wouldn’t have cheated on Alex?” I laughed. “You really need to re-evaluate yourself ma. Your argument isn’t working.” Silence filled her line. I was guessing she was trying to come back with some real shit to argue over. I started to hang up, but Lili came back on.

“Come out here” she said.

“What?”

“Come out here, to Texas. I need to talk with you, face to face.”

“What’s that going to help?” Talking to Lili was getting tiring as fuck. Especially since her emotions had her all over the place.

“A lot Chris. Can you please come out here?” Liliana pled. “I swear I won’t touch you” she giggled.

“Ha, bet not. Or I’m telling Young Vato to come beat yo ass” I joked.

“Call him Young Vato and he gone beat yo ass” She joked back.

“Ha, wish that nigga would” I said a little more seriously this time.

“So you’re coming?” Liliana’s voice rose.

“Yeah. I guess” I smacked my lips.

“What you mean ‘you guess’?”

“I guess Imma come see yo big head ass” I let out a laugh. I heard Lili smack her teeth.

“Whatever negro. What day” She asked with an ass load of attitude.

“Try tomorrow. When you rich, a private jet ain’t shit” I flaunted.

“Whatever! Call me when you land so I can sneak your ass on campus”

“You whipping?”

“Yeah nigga! You think I don’t know what money is. I got that shit. You think you rich… I’m just as rich as you are.”

“So then why you act like you couldn’t afford to pay me back?” I asked about when we went shopping last week.

“Because, I’m stingy with my mullah. Instead of spending, I save that shit and wait to cash out. Learn something from me” She yawned.

“You sleepy?” I changed the subject.

“Yeah why?”

“What time is it over there? I asked.

“7pm”

“Wake up at 10 pm and pick me up at Eastwood iight?”

“iight…” Liliana’s voice said lowly.

“Go to sleep nigga!” I laughed.

“Get off the phone then.” Liliana said before she hung up. 

Ty

“Wassup” I greeted Honey. I hadn’t seen her in a while, ain’t no way I was gone miss this.

“Nothing much really, just been, in the back” Honey said smoothly. Her new persona was on some other shit. Honey was laid back now, not the joking ass girl who was just like me.

“Why you been M.I.A cuh?” I really missed my nigga, so her explanation really meant something to me.

“Handling business” Honey looked away.

“What was up with that call that you gave me? Talking about you needed help or some shit. That you was kidnapped… Fucks up with that?”

“Look,” Honey looked around. “I’m caught up in some shit, I’ve been doing some bad shit lately. The Job I just got called to do can hurt someone in your circle. I don-”

“Woah cuh! What chu mean?” I interjected.

“Look, something gone happen. I got a call from my boss, who got a call from a client, saying that something ain’t right. I can’t tell you exactly what’s gone happen, but some shits going down.” she said taking a sip of something in a styrofoam cup. 

“Bro, why are you so chill with this shit” I asked. This nigga was acting like this shit wasn’t a big deal. “WHO IS IT?”

Honey’s phone rang, she checked the ID, and immediately sprung up and left the room.

“What the fuck” I muttered as I followed Honey.

“Yeah… Where?” She said as she wrote down something on a random piece of paper. “Yeah, I’m on my way. Kay. Be there in 5 minutes… Ty-” She began until she saw me standing behind her.

“Wassup?” I said nonchalantly.

“I… Um, I gotta go”

“Hol up” Honey tried to breeze past me but I grabbed her arm as she brushed against mine. “Where you going?”

“I just got a call”

“And I just got here” I said as I pulled her closer to me.

“Please don’t play with me” Honey blushed.

“Don’t play with me” I toyed back. Again, her phone rang, of course she picked it up.

“Hello? Oh, it’s okay?” She looked over at me. “Yeah, well text me.”

“Who was that?” I kissed her shoulder.

“Business” She pulled away playfully.

“Can I handle mines?” I said in-between kisses up her arm.

“What business do you need to handle?”

“Some business with chu” I flirted.

“Where’s the meeting?”

“How bout what’s in-between my legs meet up with what’s in-between yours in every room of this hotel?”

“As long as it’s a long meeting,” Honey placed her body in mine. “I’m ready for anything” She whispered as she stroked my dick.

“What time is it?” I asked quickly.

“10:07” Honey said confused.

“iight nigga” I lifted her up and Honey wrapped her legs around my waist.

I laid her down on the comforter, unbuttoning and unzipping her jeans. Honey laid there, voluntarily allowing me to do whatever I wanted. I stopped and stared at her.

“What chu waiting for?” Honey asked impatiently.

“Ha, I ain’t fucked you in a long time” I laughed to myself. “Remind me of how you like it” I said just before I ripped her shirt right off her body.

“Ty that was my favorite shirt!” She yelled.

“I’ll buy you a new one” I said as I continued to remove her clothes roughly. The sound of my phone came blaring from the side table. Without looking, I pressed ignore.

“Who was that?” Honey asked.

“Business” I laughed subtly before Honey joined in. Once she was fully unclothed, I began to strip tease for Honey. “You like this dick” I asked as I finally dropped my draws. Honey flung her head back and let out the loudest cackle I’ve ever heard in my life. “What the fuck was that” I laughed.

“You’re dumb as fuck Ty” Honey said as she rose from the bed and placed her arms around my neck.

“You already know” I planted my hands on her waist and a kiss on her lips. My phone rang from the side again. I sighed and silenced the call. Focusing my attention back on Honey.

“Who was that?”

“I don’t know, but it ain’t important” I laid Honey back down on the bed, laying my body in-between her legs. “You miss me?” I asked sweetly as I pecked her lips.

“Hells naw” she covered her face as she giggled.

“Quit lying” I smacked my lips.

“Just Kidding bae” Honey grabbed my face and kissed my lips. She started a trail from my lips down to my chest. “What chu want?” her voice was provocative.

“A bag full of weed and two big booty bitches!”

“Well I got the weed…”

“Ha, lets fuck and smoke at the same time.”

Honey got the bag and I rolled the weed perfectly in the cigarillo. I passes it to Honey who lit it and took the first puffs. She took a long drag, holding it in, Honey kissed me and passed the smoke to my mouth.

I blew the smoke out. Honey pushed me back down on the bed and straddled me. She passed me the blunt and continued her trail she started.

Once at the beginning of my happy trail, she began playing with my dick. She continued kissing on the staff of my dick.

“Mmm” She giggled. I looked down at her and smiled before taking a long drag.

Honey moved up towards the base of my “other half” and licked it’s length, sending shivers through a niggas body.

“Damn bae, where you get that from?” I said breathlessly.

“Just thought I’d try something different”

“Shits delightful” I said jokingly.

“I can tell” she smiled as she held a grip on the shaft of my peen.

The sound of music filled the air, Honey and I both froze and glanced to where the music was coming from. Both our phones had gone off at the same time.

Honey looked up at me before she walked to answer the call. Might as well answer whoever it was I thought.

“Hello” I said.

“Yo Ty! Where have you been!”I barely heard Savonna over some fussing in the background.

“Where the fuck you at?” I asked.

“Man I’m at home! My daddy and Yo mama got into a big ass argument and they fighting, cussing, yelling, and breaking shit. Come home dude! I need your help” she said as the sound of shattering glass was heard. I sighed before telling her I was on my way.

“I gotta- Ha, You first” Honey and I both said in unison.

“Look I just gotta call that I need to take care of… You think we could get a raincheck on this” Honey said shyly.

“Yeah, I got drama at home I need to tend to.”

Mijo

“Aye bae” I shouted as i kept my concentration on MW3.

“What!” I heard her shout from behind me.

“When you gone tell pops to give it up” I addressed her as she walked over and found a comfortable spot on the couch.

“After I get my deal, I’m out that bitch” Kamary said.

“Y’all be fucking” I asked still giving my total attention to the game.

“Unfortunately” Her voice filled with disgust.

“EW you like that old dick. That wrinkled, shriveled up dick” I nudged her arm.

“Shut the hell up nigga! Cause you like to beat this box like it ain’t been used before”

“That’s cause my dick ain’t shriveled and I don’t got to use Viagra”

“You’re right about one part” she tapped the controller out of my hand playfully.

“Oh you playing now? You don’t want none from the Aztec Warrior” I mimicked baby joker.

“Let’s play”

Liliana

“Hey slime… yo kids back” I heard the chants of some of the homies as I walked down Landon Hall. It felt good to be back. Especially with this warm ass welcome that I got as I walked in. Of course there was some hating ass bitches giving me the side eye as I walked by, but guess what… Who the hell CARES.

“You still ain’t shit” I heard Crystal mumble as I walked by. I stopped dead in my tracks, back peddling to where she was.

“EEEERRRR!” I yelled as I met up with her face to face. A big ass crowd began to form. And of course, the loud mouth of Landon Hall, Kristie had began instigating in the background. “Excuse me. Would you mind repeating yourself?”

“Ha, what the fuck are you talking about” Crystal looked to her friends and they all began to laugh. Crystal was standing in the door way of her dorm with her peasant ass “friends” behind her. I chucked lowly as I remembered how Brehana told me she fucked Crystal up. Besides the 10 pounds of make up this hoochie had caked on her face, you could still notice the blacking around her eye, her swollen lip, and a few scratch marks.

“Damn” I winced in pain as I took a step forward to examine her face. Crystal instantly took a step back. Her and her “girls” were confused.

“What?” Crystal tried to cover up her confusion, but the bitch wasn’t cutting it worth a damn.

“Girl… BREHANA FUCKED YO FACE UP CUH!” The whole hallway began a fit of laughter.

“Man fuck you” Crystal smacked her lips and tried closing the door quickly, but I put my foot on the threshold just in time.

“Look bitch,” I said just low enough for only Crystal and I to hear. “If you got some shit to say ma… Say it to my face. On the set, I’ll fuck you up. Don’t play with me” My words left scents of venom throughout the air, everyone dispersed quickly.

***

“I really wish we roomed together!” Micel said as she went through her clothes in her closet to find something to wear for tonight’s events. The PSF, or Private Student Functions club was throwing their annual ‘End of the Bling Bash’. Its basically a party to celebrate the end of Spring Break.

“I know right, you love seeing this pretty ass face huh” I made myself comfortable on her bed.  

“Mayne fuck you son!” Brehana threw a pillow directly at my head. I began to die laughing hysterically on her bed. Micel’s fat ass accent came out. I don’t know where she got this ugly country ass accent, but it was funny as shit. “I wish we were rooming, so when Chris bring his sexy ass up here, he can look at me and not at you” I instantly stopped laughing and shot her a dirty mug.

“Chris ain’t coming up here for me, so I know he ain’t coming up here for you” The melancholy in my voice was purely evident.

“Why won’t Chris come up here for you”

“He’s not my man. And in all actuality, I don’t even know what kind of fucking relationship we have going on here.”I sighed heavily and covered my face. I had this feeling, that Chris didn’t want me for any type of relationship, all he wanted was to get some ass while he worked.

“How are you feeling.” Brehana sat on the bed with me and began rubbing my back.

“Like everything is too fast, like I’m being used, and like I’m being hypocritical to myself and Alex” Tears itched the back of my eyes, but I blinked them away. I’m not gone go out like a punk.

“How is everything going too fast?” Brehana asked out of curiosity. I already know, she wanted the full scoop right now.

“This exposure shit came way too fast and I ain’t even released any type of music yet! People gone think I’m a jumpoff who was messing with Chris so she could become famous! And I did not plan on having sex with Chris… At all! Plus, I didn’t tell you that Alex purposed to me, then right after that, I lost my virginity to Chris” I let my head hand in shame as Brehana gasped. “I planned on giving Alex my virginity, but one thing led to another, and my ditsy ass forgot about Alex. Cold part too, I had sex with the ring on, I guess Chris was looking at it the whole time, then asked me about it right after we finished.”

“What did you tell him!” Brehana urged.

“I told him that Alex gave it to me, but I never told him why.”

“What did he say afterward?”

“He asked me, why was I with him then he told me that I was his. Th-”

“WHAT THE FUCK! PLEASE tell me you didn’t fall for that shit.” Brehana broke out in this rant.

“Just shut the hell up and listen girl! I told Chris that we both belonged to other people, so I couldn’t be his, then I told him that he was cute when he was mad, and I tried to kiss him” I said reluctantly.

“Are you done?” Brehana said calmly.

“Yeah”

“You’re fucking RETARDED!” she yelled as she got up from the bed.

“Fuck you mean?” I yelled back.

“He don’t want yo ass… He want yo ASS” Brehana turned around and stuck her butt in my face.

“What the fuck!” I swatted her ass out my face and stood up from the bed. “Don’t be on that homo shit nigga!”

“I’m not! I’m just saying, you got Alex, the man of your dreams in the palm of your hand. A good man, who you KNOW will take care of you, treat you right, and won’t ever cheat on you… But you looking past Alex and thinking about Chris low down dog ass.”

“Woah woah… chill now… Chris ain’t the man you think he is”

“Tell me how you would know… We on the same side of the fence nigga! We don’t know any real shit about Chris. All we know is the Chris Brown we see on T.V, The internet, and in his music.” Brehana paused and let out a quick sigh before she began. “Look man… I know this is you accomplishing your music dream, but do you really want to destroy your dream of having the perfect man, the perfect family… for a nigga who hasn’t been there for your bad times…”

“Bre stop…”

“Who hasn’t seen you cry” Brehana continued on.

“Man forreal” I scrunched up my face as I felt the tears welt in my eyes. Brehana stepped closer as she continued to lecture.

“Who didn’t almost get himself killed trying to protect you… Who saved your damn life! And you’re just gonna be selfish and shit?”

“Man I’m gone!” I grabbed my luggage and stormed out of the room. I heard Brehana shout ‘Think about what you’re doing before someone gets hurt. I just hope it won’t be you’

My mind was running fast as I stormed out of Brehana’s dorm. I used my arm to prevent any one who I passed to see me crying. What the fuck was I thinking? What the hell was I doing? Chris isn’t the man for me… But we haven’t spent enough time to tell that… What if he hurts me? What if he abandons me like David?

 No one besides Alex and Brehana knew about my abusive ass ex-boyfriend David. Mentally, Physically, and Emotionally… that nigga had me on love lockdown forreal. I was so caught up in pleasing him, that I almost killed myself trying to be ‘perfect’. If it wasn’t for Alex, I probably would be dead right now… How could I dishonor our loyalty and trust. How could I do some shit like this.

This shit with me and Chris just has to end.

Chris

“Fuck” I muttered low to myself. Ty had that infamous grin on, indicating that some shit wasnt right, and his ass was bouta find out wassup. Mijo on the other hand was confused as hell. His eyes shifted from me over to Rih, then back at me. His eyebrows furrowed together and he was trying to disguise his frown.

“Wassup Brown” Mijo said as he made himself comfortable next to Rih. She rolled her eyes and scooted over, reluctantly. Ty scooted in next to me.

“What y’all niggas doing?” Ty added emphasis to every word, making this situation even more uncomfortable. I ran my hands over my face, placing my elbows on the table top. “Since y’all nigga not gone answer we just gone sit h-”

“MICHAEL!” Ty’s mom yelled from another table, causing a sigh of relief to release it’s self from Rih and I. Ty’s mom stormed over with this pissed off facial expression. “You and Mijo get your asses back to the table!” She yelled. “Hey Chris”

“Hey Mrs. Stevenson” I said timidly.

“It’s Choi now… Get cha asses up!” She said while yanking Ty’s ear.

“We got y’all later” Mijo said to Rih and I, but it seemed as if the question was meant more for Rih than me.

“What was that about” I asked Rih when Mijo was completely out of earshot.

“What are you talking about” Rih said after she placed her order. 12 Honey Barbecue boneless wings.

“What you like sir” The Waitress smiled.

I quickly glanced over to her and responded 24 traditional Caribbean Jerk Wings.

“Chris, you really gonna eat 24 of them?” Rih stared at me wide-eyed.

“I ordered them right” The waitress stood there confused as fuck. I stated my order again and she nodded then walked away.

“What Mijo said”

“What?” Rih’s face mimicked that of the waitress’.

“What the fuck was that about with Mijo! Why did he look at you like that? Why y’all come to the meeting? Why y’all together? What’s going on with y’all-” I babbled on.

“CHRIS!” Rih interrupted my rant. “Why you got so many questions” she chuckled.

“Shit ain’t sitting right on my stomach. Now answer my questions Robyn. Don’t be shady either” There’s so many questions left unanswered that I knew Mijo wouldn’t answer, so I had to ask another source. His … ‘girl’.

“What chu want to know?” Robyn swept her hair over her shoulder.

“Everything… I thought I made that evident.” I replied rudely. She know what I want to know, so she might as well tell everything.

“What chu mean everything?” Rih’s facial expression jumped from confused to afraid in an instant. It was evident that some shit wasn’t right.

“Rihanna don’t play with me! What are you and Mijo doing together!” I pounded my fist on the table, causing Rih to jump.

“Look I gotta go” She rose up from the table quickly, bitch got up so fast that there was not way I was gone be able to stop her. So I let her walk off, ate her food, paid, and bounced before Mijo and Ty decided they wanted to plan Nancy Drew.

***

I knew I couldn’t go back to Kae’s pad for the night, so I decided to rent me a hotel, and order a ticket back to VA. I needed some time away from this madness in Cali. When I finally received my room key, a fat ass group of fans were waiting outside the hotel. I decided to go out and take pictures, sign autographs, and chat it up. That’s one thing I wish I could do everyday… give back to the ones who gave to me.

***

10:30pm rolled around and Liliana’s ass still ain’t called me and told me if she made it safely or not. I was starting to worry. I shook my head and laughed at myself.

“Why the fuck are you worried for?” I said before glancing over to my phone one last time. I thought about all the possibilities that could happen to her and snatched my phone off the side drawer and dialed her up.

“Hello?” Lili’s voice was uncertain. I was surprised she even answered the phone. Lili let that bitch ring till the call almost ended.

“Whats good ma?” I relaxed back on my bed.

“Chillin”

“What chu doing? How was your flight”

“Coo”

“Is there something wrong” I asked. This one wordedness was getting annoying and pointless as hell.

“We gotta talk…” Lili sighed heavily.

“Psh” I half laughed at her line. She sounded like she was bouta sing Say Goodbye to me. My own song tho? I thought to myself. “We on the phone, so talk nigga!”

“We gotta quit.” She began

“What are you talking about” Her vague ass statements was about to get her hung up on. She needa hurry up and get to the point. Ain’t nobody got time for this.

“I can’t fucks with you like that Chris”

“HA” I chuckled loudly. “Is this about Alex’s ass” I joked.

“It actually is” Liliana’s voice was hard as rocks.

“Forreal babe” I smacked my lips.

“Look Chris, quit calling me babe, boo, and all that other ole shit. We just needa keep this a business/friend relationship.”

“Why?” There was a little bit of emotion in there. What would make her not want to be with me? What have I done wrong?

“Beca-“ Static filled my ear. Then my phone beeped, indicating a call dropped. I tried calling Liliana multiple times afterward, but they all went to voicemail.

Eventually, my thoughts about this situation drowned my mind. I questioned every move I’d made on Lili… I genuinely gave a shit about her. What more was there for me to do?

Tyga

“Honey?” I asked the person on the other line.

“Ty… let’s meet up. I got some things that I feel I need to warn you about… Meet me at 819 South Flower Street” Honey led on.

“iight” I said as I typed the address into my phone’s GPS.  “What’s this about?”

“You’ll see”